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Entries in star wars (4)

Wednesday
Dec122012

What I'm Secretly Thinking

We all have secret thoughts. Just little things we think and keep to ourselves. I have many secret thoughts. And I'm still going to keep most of them to myself. But here are some that wont create an international incident. 

 

Secret Thought: 

When I eat pretzel sticks, I pretend they are logs and that I'm a giant. I like to think that I stumbled upon some kind of medieval village and all the people there are cutting down their forests to provide me with food so I don't eat them. 

 

Secret Thought:

When I'm pooping I pretend that my body is sort of like the ship from Star Trek and all these little tiny people are inside of control rooms working hard together to make a good poop happen. After it's over, they congratulate each other and some of them get medals. 

 

Secret Thought:

Almost every single time I've ever been to church since I was about 5, I sit there pretending that Star Wars guys are having an epic battle and destroying every thing. Like Yoda is using the force to make crosses fly into the the chest of Storm Troopers and stuff. It's gets really bloody. It's messed up. It's all I can think about when I'm there. 

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Monday
Apr022012

Star Wars Cat Uses The Force Against Dog Vader

 

I said "dog vader." That was my joke. It's good to see I haven't lost my edge. Still, this is so much better than any of the horrible changes that the horrible George Lucas has made to Star Wars. This at least, makes sense. 

Friday
Oct212011

Happy Birthday Carrie Fisher

 

Carrie Fisher turns 55 today, and she doesn't look a day over 90. If I had known then what I know now, a lot of perfectly good Star Wars sheets would never have been ruined.

Happy Birthday Princess Leia. Thanks for ruining my life.  

 

Tuesday
Sep202011

Blu Ray Star Wars Doesn't Look That Bad