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Entries in old people (8)

Wednesday
Jun272012

Why I Hate The New McDonald's Commercial 

 

Normally when a commercial comes on tv, I quickly change the channel. I don't need to be bombarded with ads telling me what to buy and what to do! I just want to watch my program and enjoy a delicious Arby's beef 'n cheddar sandwich. But the other day when the commercials began, I couldn't find my well made Samsung remote control and was forced to watch one of the most annoying commercials ever. Even drinking an ice cold Pepsi didn't help with my aggravation. 

The commercial is for McDonald's oatmeal. Watch this b.s.:

First of all, mind your own freakin business old lady! If this happened in real life there would be punches thrown. 

Second of all, why are you sitting so close! I've never been in a fast food restaurant that was so full of people that strangers had to sit that close to each other. Lies!

Third of all, is it really that shocking that people put things in oatmeal? It's only been happening for like 15 years you old idiot. Learn about oatmeal and stop bothering young people! 

"What's all that la de da?" It's robots. No, it's fruit! You've seen fruit before, you ass!

America ... this commercial is everything wrong with all of us.  

Burger King is better.  

Tuesday
Jan172012

Homemade Root Beer And Peanut Butter Pop Tart Recipe


This video, of an old mountain man sharing his Homemade Pop Tart recipe, is a little bit long. But so is his beard and toe nails, so it makes sense. I know the guy doesn't sound like a culinary genius, but his homemade squirrel and pig skin Hot Pocket recipe was delicious.  

 

Monday
Dec122011

The Most Heart Warming Returning Cat After Tornado Video You'll See All Hour

"I have everything in the world now." 

I love that so much. I really do. It almost breaks my heart to remind her of what she doesn't have. 

- a home
- driveable car
- husband
- youth

But yeah, the cat's nice too. 

Click to read more ...

Saturday
Dec032011

Papi's Living Video Will

His loss can not be measured. But what can be measured is what he left behind for all to enjoy:

He'll be missed. 

Thursday
Nov032011

3.5 Million People Are Still Using AOL Dialup!

According to the internet, America Online still has 3.5 million people using their dialup service. I assume these are all old people. Because the elderly are dumb and should never be respected.

Unless you're Helen Keller who would put up with this?: 

I made a Helen Keller reference. I'm old : /

Anyhoo, here are pictures of old people on the internet with my funny disrespectful captions underneath. 

 

So that's what bukkake is. 

Click to read more ...

Friday
Oct212011

Freestyle Canoeing!

Freeystyle Canoeing: Is it art? Is it sport? Is it spart? Whatever you want to call it, it's still better than soccer. 

And ladies if you like Marc Ornstein in a canoe, just imagine him in the bedroom. It's very similar. He starts slow, uses a paddle, you'll get a little wet, and some guy is going to videotape it. 

Pretty good, but still not my favorite canoe video. 

Click to read more ...

Tuesday
Sep202011

Craigslist Old Man: An Adorable Creeper

 

Aw, this is adorable. Except for the part about her likely being dead, and he likely being serious about beating her.